Whatever Happened To...Part III

Shabba Ranks

Ting-a-ling-a-ling, school bell ring!! Remember that song? Well let me school ya'll n this pioneer of reggae music. After several hit singles and albums Shabba Ranks became the first dancehall artist to win a Grammy. His most memorable song for me was "flex...time to have sex" - let's keep in mind that I was only in 4th grade at the time. This just in..Mad Cobra is the artist that released Flex. My ignorance proceeds me.

But where is "Mr. Loverman" now? Shabba is set to release a new album next month. Let me know how it is because I aint buying it. But all I can think about is why the hell did brothas (and Vanilla Ice) wear that gumby haircut back in the day?

Allure

This group consisted of five girls who sang their hearts out for hmmmmm, 10 maybe 15 seconds. But what really stood out about these girls was their ghetto fabulous names: Linnie, Alia, Lalisha, Akissa and last but not least Laquoia. (Try saying that 5 times fast..if you can pronounce them!) I believe Laquoia was kicked out of the group early on and was unable to enjoy the brief success of the group. Girl, you aint miss nothing...

"What sets Allure apart from other artists," says Akissa, "is that we really want to have a career. We 're not looking to have one hit record - we are looking for a lifetime of hits."

I wonder if Akissa still has her foot in her mouth? True, the group released subsequent albums but nothing came close to the success of their first effort.

I still love the song they did with 112, "All Cried Out" but I have to say, these chicks fell off. The problem was, and this is only my opinion, the group was too crowded. Four cute girls can do okay for a while but four average looking chicks with makeup on? Now that's asking a lot. (Just kidding- these ladies are beautiful...in a housepet kind of way)

- a perfect example would be Destiny's Child. They had to slim down to three females before they could fit through the proverbial doorway to stardom. Furthermore, you always have to have one person that outshines the others. How many successful female groups are making hit after hit? And the ones that have worked have had 3-4 girls tops. TLC, En Vogue, The Supremes, Xscape...wait a minute. What happened to Xscape?

Xscape


Let's start from the beginning. Xscape's debut album was titled, "Hummin' Comin' At 'Cha". So ladylike. Anyway, this R&B quartet consisted of two sisters, Latavia and Latoya -excuse me, Latocha and Tamika Scott and friends Kandi Buress and Tameka Cottle aka "Tiny".

When they first emerged, there was something about them that I could quite put my finger on. Something about those baggy jumpers and oversized t-shirts. I think the proper term would be...dyke-ish. This was before the term became mainstream and it became cool for girls to dance with girls. I was actually very attracted to one member of the group and the tomboy stylings did not help. I take that term "dyke" back and replace it with...let's say "androgynous".

Kandi went solo and did lots of song writing for other artists. Most memorably penning the 1999 Grammy winning hit, No Scrubs. Tameka is now an ordained minister and recorded a gospel album. By no means were these ladies one hit wonders. I would feel very comfortable buying their second and third albums.